I found chapter 4 to be very insightful and interesting, for anyone in a relationship or even for someone that is single. Myself speaking, I am currently in what I find to be, a very healthy relationship. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 9 months now, we have our struggles and our fights but our communication skills allow us to work through our problems and guide us to a resolution. As I read chapter 4, there was a section that stated “How do you know whether you’re in a healthy relationship? Answering some basic questions can help you determine whether a relationship is working.” So, I proceeded to answer the following questions regarding my current relationship.
- Do you love and care for yourself to the same extent that you did before the relationship? Can you be yourself in the relationship? Do you feel that you are equals in the relationship?
- Do you share interests, values, and opinions? is there a mutual respect for, and civil discussion of, differences?
- Are there genuine caring and goodwill? Are there mutual encouragement and emotional support?
- Do you trust each other? Are you honest with each other? Can you comfortably express feelings, needs, and desires?
- Is there room for growth as you both evolve and mature?
So, as I read each question and thought about my relationship for the most part I said yes. There were a few questions that I had to think about, for example my boyfriend and I share different opinions when it comes to our political views. When the topic comes up in conversation of course we disagree, but there is a respect level we have for one another allowing us to listen to one another and have a civil discussion. I wouldn’t say there isn’t room for growth in our relationship but what relationship doesn’t have it’s issues?
Which leads me to my next point…
Relationships and Social Media
This section in chapter 4 really stood out to me because if there is one problem I notice in my relationship it’s social media. Unlike my boyfriend, I tend to post a greater amount on social media and rely more on technology than he does. I notice that at times it can irritate him, yesterday I posted pictures of us for “national boyfriend day” and I was very upset that he only “liked” the pictures and did not write anything instead (I know very minor issue that really doesn’t matter) but to me it does because I find it to be showing affection and appreciation for me. I brought up the issue I was having and we discussed it, we went back and forth bickering at times but finally we came to a resolution. I am grateful for the high level of communication and respect we have for one another, because if we didn’t I am not sure what our fight could have possibly lead to or how far it would have gone.
“Be aware that your partner might not be as comfortable with posting information to social media as you are. Be mindful, and ask permission, before posting any pictures of you as a couple or information about your activities or whereabouts.” (pg. 76)
Update on quitting cigarettes
So, this week was actually a little bit better than last week but still nowhere close to where I want to be. My stress level from last week is definitely not as high, so that does help fight the urge of wanting a cigarette. Something great I can share with you all about the past week is that 2 out of the 7 days of the week I did not have a cigarette once! and for any of you that know what it is like to have a cigarette addiction or know someone that does, that is a BIG deal. As I said before, I’m nowhere close to where I want to be but I know that I am making progress and that this is something I really want to achieve. These may be little steps, but they are steps and I believe enough in myself and my will power that I will kick this nasty habit of mine.
Thanks for coming back to read more!
October 4th, 2018
Lizzys Truth 